Not in lines. Not in traffic. Not in life. Not in anything!
Right now, I am in a holding pattern. I am needing to wait. I am needing to wait and see what God has planned and then figure out the next step after that.
I like to have things planned out. I like to have options. Even if there is a Scenario A and a Scenario B, I like to have a plan for each one.
But right now, I can’t do that. There are too many variables. I have to wait. I have to wait and see what God has planned and move when He says to. And not before.
I have some dear friends, who are AWESOME women, dealing with infertility right now. It breaks my heart. God, why do they have to wait? Why won’t you take care of it now? I have learned so much from them as they go through this journey. They have been wonderful enough to share what they are thinking, feeling, learning through conversations and blogs.
It is through some of our most torturous waiting that God teaches us so much. It is during those times that we learn to cling to God tighter than we did before. It is during those times when we HAVE to slow down, that we do. And we look around. And we look at what is going on, who is around us, where we see God working. But we have to stop to do that.
But when we stop, we have to wait.
The Bible is full of examples of people who had to wait. And they lived longer then, so some of them had to wait hundreds of years! If I have to wait a hundred seconds it feels like forever!
I’m reminded of Hannah in the Bible. She suffered taunting and cruelty because she went years without being able to have a child. She was depressed. She had to wait a long time and endure before having a child.
The Israelites had to endure hundreds of years of slavery before being free. Waiting. Wondering if it will ever happen.
Each generation wondered when the Messiah would come. Each generation wanted Him to come in all His power and glory and change everything! They waited.
I see my loved ones wait. Wait for a child. Wait for a job. Wait for a spouse. Wait for a loved one to come back home. Wait for life to change. Wait. I wait…
But God does not leave us in the waiting. He never wastes a moment. There is nothing in our life that we can do that doesn’t serve a purpose or that God can’t use to teach us something. Even in the waiting.
So, I will wait. I will ask God for patience and to teach me right now. I will ask Him to make more into the woman He’s created me to be. I will wait. And not despise this time. I will try really hard (hey, I’m not promising anything!) to cherish it and maybe even enjoy it.